50 photo book caption ideas that don't sound like a greeting card

A caption has one job: tell the reader something the photo can't. Who is this, where were you, what happened just before or just after. Under 240 characters, in your own voice. Here are fifty patterns to borrow.

The four that always work

1. Who, where, when. "Tom and Mia at Ōhope, January."
2. What was said. "She looked at the cake and said, 'Is that all for me?'"
3. What happened next. "Ten seconds later he was in the pond."
4. Why you chose it. "This is the face she makes when she's concentrating. You make it too."

Children

• First day of school. The bag is bigger than she is.
• Lost her first tooth and charged the tooth fairy double.
• He built this himself and would like you to know that.
• Three years old and already bossing the dog around.
• She read to the baby for a whole hour.
• The haircut we don't talk about.
• He got the lead in the school play. He was a tree. A very good tree.
• Swimming without armbands for the first time.
• She wore this for nine days in a row.
• Asleep in the car before we left the driveway.

Everyday life

• Sunday lunch. Your recipe, slightly burnt.
• The garden, finally doing what the packet promised.
• Our street after the first frost.
• The dog has claimed your chair for when you visit.
• What the kitchen looks like when the children cook.
• Homework, with assistance from the cat.
• The view from my desk. I think of you when the tūī shows up.
• The new house. Your room is the one on the left.
• Saturday sport: cold, muddy, a win.
• This is what a normal Tuesday looks like here.

Holidays and occasions

• Christmas morning, 6.04am.
• The whole table went quiet when the pudding came out.
• We wished you were there for this one.
• It rained every day and nobody minded.
• The furthest any of us has ever walked.
• His first time seeing the sea.
• Fifteen candles. He blew them out in one go.
• The wedding. You'd have liked the band.
• We raised a glass to you at exactly this moment.
• The fish was this big. There are witnesses.

Old photos

• You, at the age Mia is now. Look at the chin.
• Your wedding day, 1974. Mum found it in the blue album.
• The old house. Do you remember the plum tree?
• Dad in the school uniform he swore he never wore.
• Four cousins on one sofa, forty years ago.
• Who is the man on the left? We'd love to know.

Group shots

• Left to right: Kate, Dave, Sophie, Leo, and Tom pulling a face.
• Everyone who could make it. We left a space for you.
• Three generations, one sofa.
• The only photo this year with everyone's eyes open.
• All eleven grandchildren, briefly still.

When you can't think of anything

• We love you.
• This one's just because it's a good one.
• Come and see it for yourself soon.
• Thinking of you.
• Just the date and the place. That's enough.

Name people in group photos. A grandparent knows who everyone is. The carer, the neighbour and the new great-grandchild's future partner will not.